Little Bundle!!

welp.

the time has come. there is no turning back now.
  the world should know.

a little bundle of joy will be joining the curtis clan on august 25th, 2012!!

(it will be born in the year of the Dragon... according to my co-worker, everyone wants to have a Dragon baby because it is good luck. so welcome to the curtis clan, Dragon baby!)

i'm almost 14 weeks along and plugging along!

the sickness that comes along with pregnancy is no bueno, and my brain feels like a slug, but when i was able to see this little nugget bounce around in me, it made it all worth it!

i never want to forget the sound of it's heartbeat.  spiritual moment indeed!

stay tuned for how i announced it to all of our loved ones!

enjoy the vid. the child is upside down in me so don't feel stupid if you don't see it at first... or do. whatever

here's to almost being done with my first trimester!

the root of all heartache

I found this quote on pinterest yesterday and I can't stop thinking about it.

I am a person that sets high expectations for myself and others around me...

(I think I get it from my mom!)

My dog woke me up at 4 in the am this morning and I was a little.... pissed... to say the least.

I haven't been sleeping well anyways, and then to feel this massive dog take up half the bed was not my idea of a good nights sleep.

I tossed and turned trying to get back to sleep, but nothing was helping. 

The thought crossed my mind, "Hey, the other night when Andrew couldn't sleep, I sat and tickled his back at 3 in the am... he knows I'm awake right now... why isn't he offering to do the same to me?"

In my ornery 4:00 state, I dwelled on that a little longer than I should've.

But, WHY?

I was setting these expectations for him last night that he had no idea about. 

I was getting mad at him for something that I really shouldn't have even expected him to do!

After about 5 minutes of muttering to myself in my head, this quote popped into my head.

"EXPECTATION IS THE ROOT OF ALL HEARTACHE."

Sometimes Most of the time, I expect WAY too much out of my dear husband when in all reality, he is doing his darndest!  It is my expectation of him that causes me to be mad or upset, which in turn causes heartache for the both of us.

I have just decided that I need to not expect so much out of myself and others and to let others run their own course.  I can't control someone else's life with my expectations.

Here is to a new leaf turned!  Here is to trying to accept others differences and LOVE them for it. 

Here is to good ol' William Shakespeare!

(p.s.  Sorry if I have every made any of you out there feel bad for not living up to MY expectations... please know that I'm trying to overcome it and to see the beauty in "the other roads traveled")

My thoughts on... Boudoir

Alright.  I'm opening up my big trap and going to speak about a topic that is Raging HOT these days... that is the "art" of Boudoir. I know that several of my friends have done this and that is totally okay with me! But I just wanted to share my thoughts on why I will never do this for me or my husband.

I want to be honest.  When I first saw images popping up on Facebook and Pinterest, I thought, "Oh that would be fun! I would love to do that for Andrew!".  But in reality, I think a big portion of my desires to do that were more so to satisfy something within myself.  Everywhere you look you see images of "sexy" woman (according the world) and it is easy for me to think that I am not sexy because of the way I dress.  I thought it would be fun to dress up (or I guess "dress down") and get some pictures done that only myself and Andrew would look at.

But then this thought crossed my mind.  Why would I want to give my husband something that he could hold and look at in hopes to turn him on?  Isn't that like introducing pornography to my husband (Even if it is his own wife?)  The LAST thing I would want would be for my husband to start turning to an "image" if I am out of town with work or not around the house in order to satisfy himself.

I have been following the new website "Fight the New Drug" and I have heard some pretty interesting facts.  On the website it states:

"Well, there’s been lots of research done, and it turns out that looking at porn changes the way you see others, and even yourself. It changes the way you act towards others, and can even change your values."

I have heard stories of guys, Good, GREAT, OUTSTANDING guys, that can get turned on by looking at a billboard of a girl in a bikini advertising for laser hair removal.  These guys aren't out there actively seeking it, but Satan has a way of getting into their brain and making that girl in a bikini become "alive" in there for even just a brief moment. Then this great guy feels guilty that they thought those things even though they weren't seeking it out!

So in a way, it would suck for me to give an image of myself to my husband and then for that image to come "alive" in his brain and then for it to spread to other things... no me gusta.

I found these stats online and wanted to share:

"According to the article Top 10 Internet Pornography Statistics, every second, $3,075.64 is being spent on pornography; every second, 28,258 internet users are viewing pornography; every second, 372 internet users are typing adult search terms into search engines; and every 39 minutes, a new pornographic video is being created in the U.S.


There are more than 4.2 million pornographic internet sites, which comprises 12% of the total websites. A staggering 42.7% of internet users view porn. "The pornography industry has larger revenues than Microsoft, Google, Amazon, eBay, Yahoo, Apple, and Netflix combined. Worldwide Pornography Revenues ballooned to $97.06 billion in 2006.""

UNBELIEVABLE. But believe it.

Basically all I am trying to say, in my non-eloquent way, is that I would rather have my husband enjoy his time with his wife in flesh.  I don't want to tamper with this all too dangerous drug in hopes that I myself will feel sexy or to give him a great Valentines Gift. 
 
Like I said before, if you have done this and you are excited about it- PLEASE don't be offended by this. This is MY choice as to why I won't but I also wanted to shed my light on the subject just in case someone is on the line about doing it.  But I still respect and LOVE those that do! :)
 
For more info on how to Fight the New Drug, check out this freaking awesome website:
http://www.fightthenewdrug.org/index.cfm