I Hate Mistakes

I read my friend Deeaura's blog the other day (She is so witty and fantastic and I want to be like her when it comes to blogging… maybe someday)… Anywho, her whole blog post focused on this little number:
"Attitude makes all the difference.  It really does.  Choosing to make the best of any moment is the turning point in every circumstance."
I would like to second her blog post and focus on attitude and choosing the best in any given circumstance. I have to say that from mid-November until Now, the world has thrown at me some VERY difficult circumstances. I feel like up until today I have chosen to make the best of the situation (that is after I cried several times and asked "Why?" in so many of those circumstances). Life is not easy and sometimes I just want to throw a plate at the wall because I didn't get all the French Toast that I wanted! (True story but it involved my older brother Craig and him almost pushing me down the stairs on a rolling chair because he was so mad…) but back to me just wanting to throw an adult temper tantrum…
I feel like I have been "blessed" or whatever you may call it with the ability to view things in a bigger picture. I don't know if it is something I learned on my mission (which I'm sure it had a big part in it), but I try to stay positive through a lot of things. (Granted there are still the times I mope in bed, cry when I have to say goodbye to someone, lose my temper at people that have wronged me, etc. etc.)
Even though I feel that I have this ability to stay strong in situations, sometimes I feel like I have just HIT A WALL! I feel like I'm about to break down and lose everything! I feel like I have too much on my plate and that I can't handle working full time, having a puppy, spending time with husband, family, friends, working out, trying to be good at my calling, feeling like I have to be a "crafty" woman that makes and bakes things all the time in order to fit in or be a good neighbor, being strong for myself or my family when all Hell breaks loose and the world we have come to know loses a big chunk out of it. Seriously… the list could go ON and ON.
And so it will…    
I hate it when people think less of me or that I know people don't like me. I try my hardest to make friends, keep friends, be a good co-worker, be a good daughter, niece, aunt, cousin, sister-in-law, daughter-in-law, granddaughter, etc. etc. and I hate it when I screw up in any or all of those areas. I hate being dis-organized, but my desk at work and my house seem to always have a disaster brewing or even just skip the brewing and an all out blown out has occurred everywhere. I hate not looking cute, which leads to me studying the cute girls on fashion blogs or my friends pictures on Facebook and wondering how I can look more like them, I hate seeing my body and wondering why I can't be skinny with no fat on my knees or look cute in a pair of skinny jeans like so many others out there, I hate feeling like I don't measure up to a lot of people when it comes to the "wife" category- So what if I just want to eat Malt-o-Meal cereal for about every meal?? (Bless Andrew's heart because he doesn't mind…and I guess that's all that matters!) I hate it when I make a mistake at work and then I have to work to make it all better. I hate it when life gets the best of me and I break down and loose it all. I just hate mistakes.
I hate mistakes.
That is me in a nutshell and I had to write this whole novel in order for me to realize it. (It's true what they say: this writing stuff = good time therapy)
I want to succeed in videography, event planning, being a wife, someday being a mother, being crafty, being a super good cook, being a good sister, etc. I WANT all of these things but my biggest fear is that I will make mistakes! That feeling you get when you know you didn't succeed in what you were trying to do is one of my biggest fears. I don't want to fail.
Back to what Deeaura said,
"Attitude makes all the difference. It really does. Choosing to make the best of any moment is the turning point in every circumstance."

I read this weekly blog up date by Kendi from Kendieveryday and it is about her's and her husband's quest to start their own business. This was from the last week's entry:

"The best thing I can do is believe wholeheartedly in my business.
The best thing I can do is believe in my abilities, even one's I've yet to discover.
The best thing I can do is back up my idea with action, and believing in each task.
The best thing I can do is to believe, even without seeing our idea completed.

So here is to believing until I am able to see, and no matter what I see still believing there after."

I think she sums up this mess of words I have created. The best thing I can do is believe in myself and continue on. Yes, there will be bumps in the road. Yes I will be frustrated with my imperfections and mistakes. And Yes, I will choose to make the best of any moment and that will be the turning point in my every circumstance.